you have choices -- you decide. | simply love
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you have choices -- you decide.

"say who you are. really say it in your life and your work. tell someone out there who is lost, someone not yet born, someone who won't be born for 500 years. your writing will be a record of your time. it can't help but be, but more importantly, if you're honest about who you are, you'll help that person be less lonely in their world, because that person will recognize him or herself in you, and that will give them hope. and it's done so for me, and i have to keep rediscovering it; it's profound importance in my life. give that to the world rather than selling something to the world. don't allow yourself to be tricked into thinking that the way things are is the way the world must work and that in the end, selling is what everyone must do. try not to." 
- charlie kaufman {screenwriter and director}

source
these past two weeks have been so hard
brutal to say the least-
maybe tortuous would be more of the word.

which got me thinking…

what legacy do i want to leave behind?

i hope it can be a tenth of the one that imoh left behind. you have inspired me, precious moh. always in our hearts.

it's also made me realize just how precious life is. anyone who attended last weekend, left a different and better person. 

i briefly mentioned the pastor and the speeches - but they will truly stick with me for the rest of my life.
thank you. 


i feel like my perspective on life and priorities have changed so much in my 30's- things i used to think were important- things i would relentlessly convey my opinions--trying to put them onto others? just isn't the case anymore. 


i wish i could change these discussions from my past- 
but i guess that's part of the process of growing. 

now- at 31- i respect that people have different opinions 
and try to always be open-minded.

i try to find the good in everyone {so thankful i wasn't surrounded by mean girls {or guys!} in high school and college- i don't remember them ever sitting around talking about others- i miss you all} although it took some time, i now have these {very dear} friends in my life here in north carolina. very blessed.

i am trying to communicate more with those who love me for me- 
who will always be there.
 and those who aren't- 
i am letting go of- life is too short and constant negativity really brings me down. 
 
there are defining moments 
when you find yourself in places you never thought you would be in 
paths you never imagined being on 
choices you never would have wanted to have to make
witnessing seeming injustices that you never would have wanted to witness  
in those moments you have a choice 
how are you going to react   
who are you going to become
what feeling are you going to give into.

we all have choices:

how do you want to live your life?
…personally, i don't want to look back when i am 80 and every year looked the same...

how do you want others to think of you? 

what qualities do you exude to others? 

how approachable do you want to be? 

how do you want to take care of your body? 

how do you want to spend your spare time? 

how devoted do you want to be to your faith?
{and the list goes on} 


to decide.
at the moment, i choose happiness

it's not easy
natural thoughts go through my head 
trying to re-direct me 

for i decide
i decide to choose happiness
that’s who i am and
that’s who i want to stay

a place of peace 
a place of trust 
a place of loving others 
a place of patience
a place of forgiveness 

until a next fall comes
and then i will decide
i will decide again
to choose happiness

prayers my friends
i ask for your prayers
as we seek for answers for this one life-
and as we seek to make choices and decisions 
that are best for our lives
so we can leave a legacy 
that others will cherish 
one that will inspire others
to always strive to become a better person. 

… love from baltimore 
~thank you, sweet rachel, for the wonderful snack idea~

rice cake, nutella and strawberries! 

along with this beautiful card and thoughtful messages- it meant the world. 
it's a beautiful fall morning in charlotte

i am at a coffee shop in my neighborhood

there's a crisp breeze in the air
life starts all over again
when it gets crisp in the fall.
-- f. scott fitzgerald

4 comments:

  1. My parents raised me with the rule that every birthday we'd have a conversation about what I learned and realized in the past year--they still do that. Their perspective is that we should always be able to look back on the past and realize that we've learned and grown since then--I'm so glad I was taught that so that I'm able to still approach life that way.

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    Replies
    1. Rachel- this is such a fantastic idea- I absolutely love it! Thank you so much for sharing… I would love to do this with my family one day- thank you.

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  2. This is such a beautiful post and literally exactly what I needed to hear (or read)! That quote at the beginning is so fantastic and I have been thinking along those lines lately in terms of my blog and what I want to present and write about, what image am I giving to others? What am I leaving behind? Well written. xx

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  3. Thank you for this post! It is so refreshing to sit back and look at life. We need to take the time more often in this busy world to reflect on who we are and who we are to become!

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